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The Grindr code: profile abbreviations and slang explained

Reading a profile in three seconds

Grindr, Scruff, Romeo and the rest have their own language: a handful of abbreviations that tell you in one line what a man is, what he wants and what he will not do. If you are new to the apps, or new to the scene, here is the glossary. Use it to read profiles faster, and to write a profile that says exactly what you want, because clear profiles get better matches. The hanky version of this language, from the days before smartphones, is in the hanky code.

Position and role

  • Top: the man who penetrates. Bottom (bttm): the man who is penetrated. Vers: enjoys both. Vers top and vers bottom: prefers one, open to the other.
  • Side: everything except anal sex.
  • Dom and sub: dominant and submissive, in bed or in a BDSM dynamic. Master and slave, Sir and boy: stricter versions of the same.
  • Daddy: an older, usually masculine man; boy his younger counterpart, regardless of who does what in bed.
  • Pup and handler: puppy play, a playful, gear-heavy role dynamic.

Tribes and body types

  • Bear: bigger, hairy, often bearded. Cub: a younger or smaller bear. Otter: slim and hairy. Wolf: lean, hairy and rugged. Chub: a heavier man; a chaser is attracted to chubs or bears.
  • Twink: young, slim, little body hair. Twunk: a twink with muscle. Jock: athletic and into sport. Muscle: says what it means.
  • Leather: into the leather scene and its gear, see leather wear. Pig: into raw, sweaty, no-limits sex; also the name for a scene.
  • Masc, masc4masc: masculine and looking for the same. Fem: feminine presenting. Discreet: values privacy, often not out.
  • Trans, M4T, T4T: a man looking for trans partners, trans looking for trans.

Looking for what

  • Looking, RN (right now): wants to meet now. Not looking: browsing, chatting, not meeting.
  • Hookup: meeting for sex. NSA: no strings attached. FWB: friends with benefits, regular sex without a relationship. LTR: looking for a long-term relationship. Dates, friends, networking: the non-sexual options, mostly.
  • Chill: hanging out, low pressure. Into?: what are you into sexually.
  • Anon: anonymous, no names or faces. DL (down low) and closeted: not out, needs discretion. Cruising: looking for sex in public places, parks, saunas, dark rooms.
  • Hosting: has a place where you can meet. Can't host: needs to come to you or a third place. Travel or can travel: will come to you; also used by visitors in town.
  • Face pic?, more pics?: wants to see your face or more of you before deciding. NPNC: no pic, no chat. Stats?: age, height, weight, position, sometimes size.

Sex terms

  • J/O: jacking off. Bator: a man who prefers mutual masturbation to penetration, often a scene of its own. Edging: staying close to orgasm without finishing.
  • BB, raw: anal sex without a condom. Safe only: condoms always.
  • Hung: has, or wants, a big one. UC: uncut, not circumcised. Cut: circumcised.
  • DP: double penetration, two tops in one bottom. Group: three or more. Unicorn: a single man who plays with couples.
  • FF: fisting. WS: watersports, piss play. GH: gloryhole. Rimming: see Rimming 101.
  • Toys: into playing with dildos, plugs and the rest. Gear: into fetish wear, leather, rubber, sportswear.
  • Kink, BDSM, bondage, CBT (cock and ball torture), chastity, electro: the fetish menu, all of it available in BDSM and fetish, chastity and electro stimulation.

Status and safety

  • Neg: HIV negative. Poz: HIV positive. Undetectable, U=U: HIV positive with an undetectable viral load, which means the virus cannot be passed on during sex. On PrEP: takes the HIV prevention pill. Last tested: the date of the last STI test.
  • Vaxxed: vaccinated, usually mpox, hepatitis and HPV.
  • PnP (party and play), chems, T, Tina and a capital T in odd places in a profile: sex under the influence of drugs, mostly crystal meth. We list these so you can recognise them, not because we recommend them; chemsex carries serious health risks, and it is always fine to say no and move on.

Writing your own profile

Say what you are and what you want, in the words above, and leave out the list of what you are not into; that reads as a wall. Position, a few interests, whether you host, whether you are into toys or gear, and your safety practice cover ninety percent of the questions you would otherwise get. Then make sure the gear matches the words: the right cock ring, a good lube, a clean douche and a jockstrap that fits are the difference between a profile and a good night.